I have not written in my blog in for nearly two years. It isn't for lack of ideas. I always have a few of those ruminating, but I suppose I lack the courage and commitment to actually type them. I struggled with finding my voice. I wanted my writing to be informative, a little sarcastic, and above all, upbeat and funny. I just could not seem to always find that balance. I also grew disheartened when readers would take offense at what I had written. My intent was not to call anyone out, but just to share my experiences and perspective.
There were times when I wanted to write, but I was worried what people would think, and how they would react. I really wanted to write an entry after my cat, Maisy, died. I've had plenty of pets pass before, and although it is never easy, this one hit me particularly hard. I had a need to share my story, but I feared that readers would think I was a crazy cat lady and laugh derisively at my sorrow over a cat. Fear keeps me from doing a lot of things in my life; it shouldn't keep me from writing though.
Does it matter if people laugh? If they are people that I know, and they laugh because I was sentimental over a beloved pet, are they really someone I want in my life? If they are someone I don't know, why should I care what they think? These are the questions that have dogged me the past few months. I have decided though, I'm just going to write, and really, who cares what anyone thinks.
